Today "R" had spoken about us getting together, but he wasn't sure because of what he had planned. I knew in my heart that it wasn't going to happen and I am not complaining. Then I wonder did he just tell me it might happen just to play with my mind - I will never know, but that's part of the allure. That chaotic feeling you have like the world is spinning, I have gotten just a taste of it and I want more. I love that he knows how to play with my mind.

In his last email he talked about how I was wet just walking around yesterday, in my skirt & no panties. The fact that when I became owned I would be dripping wet all the time. When I read that I felt my heart shutter. Then he talked about nipple rings and how he wanted his next owned slut to wear them. Cunt rings with garters attached, the thought just makes me dizzy. His emails have just the right amount of vanilla/slut/dominating, such a turn on. I hope that he is able to continue it, because I know its hard to find someone that can.

He asked me if how I would be able to devote time to him and all I could tell him was the truth, that in a relationship when something is important you make time. My children are on their way to begin their lives and I want to find someone to be with and for years I chased after the elusive dream of a family/husband/home/diamond ring. Only to be disappointed time after time because there was always something missing.

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