Take a peek

I didn't sleep well last night, I couldn't settle down. So this posting is just a peek inside my brain, high on submission and very little sleep.

Sometimes I feel like this is all one sided because I get so much out of being with him. I am aroused when ever I think of him, talk to him and especially when we are together. I could listen to him talk for hours about whatever because he has done so much in his life and is highly intelligent. He brings me such pleasure in bed, makes me feel so beautiful and cared for. I feel like I benefit from him yet I am not sure what I give to him. I don't understand the mind of a dominant man. I have read other D blogs and try to wrap my head around it but I just don't get it.

I do recognize that he has that mind that just doesn't shut down. Since I was a young girl working in my fathers office all the way to my many years as an executive assistant, I have learned to recognize certain traits of men of power (in the form of intelligence). Their minds are always moving, always thinking. These are the men who work long hours and then go home and work some more. "P" told me that because of his business he has the ability to work 16 hrs a day, eat when he's hungry and sleep when he's tired, which may not be until 4 am because he's been up all night working. These types of men seem to need to have a woman who is ready when they are, available to them when they want it which may explain why they sometimes look for comfort elsewhere. I think about submissionandmetaphor writing about how "Sometimes, you have to make a special effort to provide the kind of service that a hard-working businessman requires. Sometimes, you have to perform tasks for which most secretarial schools do not provide training."

"P" told me last night that he is comfortable with me and I agree with him. Everytime it gets a little easier, I understand a little more. The one thing about being in this type of situtation, it makes you very sensitive to the other persons emotions. Last night he was restless, his mind was going and I could feel it.

Dinner was great, he picked out the restaurant and the food was delicious. Best of all I didn't have to worry about it, he took care of everything. We came back and he met my daughter and her boyfriend, when they stopped by. The ideal situation would have been that my daughter was on her best behavior but after being a parent for 20 years I've learned it never works the way you want it to. She was upset because I had picked up something at the store but it was wrong, anyway she did the best she could at that moment and it was a total surprise situation and she doesn't like surprises. She was cordial with him and grumpy with me.

After they left he ravished me, touching me everywhere and increasing the pain factor one notch from the previous time. When he wasn't bringing me to orgasm he was running his fingers over my body lightly, he said I looked so peaceful lying there. He has unbelievable control over himself and over me. We made it to the door again but then ended up back in the same place. This time I laughed when he had his hanky but he laughed when the cat jumped up on top of my head right in the middle of...well you know. He said that would be an image that would be hard to forget.

There must be something that he is getting from us being together, because he told me not to make any plans this weekend, that I would be busy.


  1. Sweet! Got to love cats too!

    Have fun this weekend!

  2. hey beautiful!

    kitten has been a tad busy, but have read all the latest blogs and am loving them, and your spirit within them that shines like the sun. kitten can see your heart and feel your passion for submission and it brings a chill at times and a rush at other times - heck, i have even gotten WET over some of the stuff you post, so Mee-Ooow! (which means Thanks!)

    The part i like about all your stories is that you maintain a sense of self in all of it. you lose yourself in the moment, but you do not lose yourself altogether, which is important as a submissive and more importantly as a woman/human being.

    i look forward to each and every post that pours out of you like a kid waiting for the cupcakes to finish in the oven - you are the one who gets to lick to lick the spoon though *giggles* and for that, i am happy - you deserve it, sweet butterfly!

    May you create the life you envision,

    --kitten for Sir